S e Gam Ghiùlan He Carries Me
by Gaelcelt
Summary: Frodo reflects on his past struggle to destroy the Ring... and how Sam was always there for him, guiding him along, protecting him.


These characters are not mine. 

This song by the singer/songwriter, Jennifer Berezan, was originally entitled "She Carries Me", concerning the Holy Mother/Mother Goddess, about how she helps the weakened or wounded back to the light, but for obvious reasons I changed the gender. Here, Frodo reflects on his times with Sam.

He Carries Me

_He is a boat, he is a light,_

_High on a hill in dark of night,_

_He is a wave, he is the deep,_

_He is the dark where angels sleep..._

_When all is still and peace abides,_

_He carries me to the other side_

_(Chorus:)_

_He carries me, he carries me,_

_He carries me to the other side..._

Sam... how can I begin to express how precious that you are, how grateful I am that you came, and for all of the wonderful things that you have done for me? How you kept me going. Kept me going when the shadows seemed to heavy to penetrate, a light that could not be obscured, however heavy the darkness.

True, you weren't intended at first to go... I wanted you to come, despite that I barely knew what was going on. I smile now as I remember how Gandalf dragged you in when he caught you eavesdropping...! I silently gave thanks that Gandalf had made you come along on the journey.

The Ring grew so heavy around my neck as we drew closer to Mordor, and I felt the urge to put it on, to submit to it's power... as tired and weary as you were yourself, you put that aside to protect me. My darling Sam... how could I have done what I needed to do without you beside me? You said that I would be hailed for my heroics... but the truth is that you, Samwise the Brave, you kept me going. While I might have saved our land, you saved me from myself...

_And though I walk through valleys deep_

_And shadows chase me in my sleep_

_On rocky cliffs I stand alone..._

_I have no name, I have no home..._

_With broken wings I reach to fly..._

_He carries me to the other side...  
_

I still remember Weathertop vividly, although I try to force it from my mind. The blade of the Nazgul sent chills of pain and terror through me... I could feel the power of darkness taking hold of me...

The mines of Moria, where Gandalf fell... although I found that he survived, the image of him falling frightens me still...

Cirith Ungol, where Gollum led me to... how that place haunts my dreams even now-! And the murderous face of Shelob-! She chased me this way and that before she stung me...!

But you... you saved me. It brings tears to my eyes when I think of how much I hurt you... you didn't deserve that... I should never have listened to Gollum-! You, for all of your pain, you refused to abandon me. You wounded that beast, sending her whimpering back into her cave... you saved me... from those damned Orcs at their castle. What would I have done had you not come? ... You were nearly as exhausted as I was on Mt. Doom... can I ever bring myself to realize your stubbornness? ...your strength? However deeply I know you, you cannot cease to amaze me.

_A thousand arms, a thousand eyes,_

_A thousand ears to hear my cries..._

_He is the gate, he is the door..._

_He leads me through and back once more..._

_When day has dawned and death is nigh_

_He'll carry me to the other side..._

Gone. It brings relief to me to remember that the blasted Ring is gone... I will look at the stump of what was one my first finger and the memories will rush back clearly... I recall how I collapsed on the slopes of Mt. Doom, our very destination. You were not much better of than I, but you hoisted me up onto your strong shoulders and kept climbing. All of it was dreadfully hot, outside of the mountain as well as within... The exhaustion, the pain that we had endured, all of it is over now...

You said to me once about how famous I would be, about how everyone would want to hear my story... you made me smile at that. Do not forget that I would not have gotten far without you, Samwise the Brave. You are the one who was strong. I cannot say that I can think of a time without you.

_He is the first, he is the last..._

_He is the future and the past..._

_Parent of all, of world and sky..._

_He carries me to the other side..._

"Mr. Frodo?"

Sam. My love... you need not call me that... however happy I am to hear it.

"What're you thinkin' about?"

"You." That smile of yours, will I ever grow tired of it? Or your kiss? Your embrace?

"Oh Sam, I cannot begin to express how grateful I am that I have you with me... you've been so wonderful to me..." I whisper against your soft shirt. Those beautiful green eyes that gaze into mine own with such joy never cease to take my breath... how wet your eyes are with tears...!

"Must you make me weep, even if it is of joy?" so sweet that your face is when you look at me thus, "Frodo, my love, I have so long wondered how I was so lucky to have you in my life. You were the light that guided me and guides me still." Your soft kiss upon my lips, with those words, how am I able to resist your gentle, endearing charm? To keep from falling into your arms?

"Gen melin." ("I love thee") I hear you say to me. It makes me shiver with delight... "Gen melin." I answer you softly against your shoulder.

_He carries me, he carries me,_

_He carries me to the other side..._


End file.
